Top 19 Books Every Parent Should Read

"The best way to make children good is to make them happy."A century and a half ago, Oscar Wilde revealed this secret to parents all over the world.

It would seem that everything is simple, but how many people can call themselves truly happy? We bring to your attention a list of the best books for parents that will reveal the topic of parenting a little deeper and help you raise loving, prosperous, happy and self-confident children. In our opinion, these parenting books should be in every family. 

1. "How to love a child" by Janusz KorczakJanusz Korczak is a teacher with a capital letter who devoted his life to children.

He was the first to say that every little child is already a whole person who is fundamentally different from adults. Parents love their children and wish them only the best. But they themselves do not notice how, in an attempt to achieve the ideal, they begin to train and remake them. Korczak teaches us to respect children, to love and accept them as they are. The book will not be able to be read quickly and for the sake of entertainment, every thought of the author makes you think and look inside yourself.

Why it's worth reading: the book gives you the opportunity to mentally go back to childhood to analyze and rethink some moments and better understand yourself and your children. This work is included in almost every top book for parents. 

Also read: To beat or not to beat a child2. "Secret support: attachment in the life of a child" Lyudmila Petranovskaya

What is a secret support?

This is the unconditional love of parents, on which the happiness and well—being of a person in childhood, and then in adulthood, is based. According to the author's theory, affection is even more than love. The attachment of parents to a child is care, thanks to which he becomes an increasingly independent person. The author consistently reveals the causes of bad behavior in children of all ages, gives an understanding of the mistakes of parents and ways to correct them. The book is written in an accessible language and is intended for parents, but even teachers and psychologists find it useful. Lots of funny examples and analogies make reading interesting and exciting. The author leads the narrative very gently and in a friendly way, just charges with a positive attitude: "Everything will be fine!". 

Why it's worth reading: after reading the book, you will look at the child with different eyes. You will understand what needs to be done to preserve forever that thin thread of love that children and parents are connected by. 

3. "How to give a child everything without money and connections" Dmitry KarpachevHow to raise a child correctly?

Every parent asks himself this question and, immersed in the vast world of information, studies one after another different systems of education and tries to put them into practice. The author of this book suggests an approach to the upbringing of a child based on common sense, taking into account the peculiarities and lifestyle of the family. The purpose of this approach is to form a healthy child's psyche and prepare him for independent adulthood. With the help of step-by-step tasks, you will be able to influence the behavior of the child without injuring him, set new rules for the whole family and learn how to express your love for the child so that he feels it and reciprocates you.

Why it's worth reading: following the tips outlined in this book, in seven weeks you will take your relationship with your child to a new level. And you will always be able to use clear landmarks indicating in which direction to move. One of the most convenient and easy books for parents on parenting. This work can be safely included in the section "the best books for parents about education". 

4. "If it's difficult with a child" Lyudmila PetranovskayaIn this book, the author continues to develop the theory of attachment described in The Secret Support.

In the first part, the reasons for the misunderstanding between parents and children are revealed in detail and by examples. The second gives practical advice on overcoming crisis situations (tantrums, whims, bad behavior). In a fit of anger, adults often do not control themselves and continue to use erroneous parenting methods learned from their parents. The author reminds that it is necessary to fight with the problem, not with the child, and insists on the inadmissibility of physical and emotional violence. Don't fight with the child, be on his side!

Why it's worth reading: the book will help you move away from the usual patterns in your own parental behavior. You will learn to hear and understand your child, make more balanced and calm decisions.  

5. "Independent child, or How to become a "lazy mom"" Anna BykovaThe book of the mother of two children, teacher, psychologist and art therapist Anna Bykova is not at all for lazy moms.

To develop independence in children, it is necessary to make tremendous efforts. First, eradicate the desire to do everything for the child and control his every step. With the help of life examples, the author shows exactly what parents are doing wrong and how to fix the situation. The author teaches to cope with negative emotions, to hear yourself and your child. All the tips are tested by the author in practice. The book is written in a light ironic style and leads the reader from the simple to the complex. 

Why it's worth reading: you will understand the consequences of overprotection, get rid of excessive anxiety and try a new experience for yourself, not a lazy, but a reasonable mother.

6. "Five Ways to a child's Heart" Chapman Gary, Campbell RossThe book is a guide for parents on how to find the only right way to understanding with a child.

According to the authors, parents express their love with the help of five conditional "languages": touching, praise, gifts, help and time spent together. An entire chapter is devoted to each of them, which provides live examples and stories from practice. A separate chapter describes the methods that will help determine the "language of love" for a particular child. The authors emphasize the need for the manifestation of negative feelings in children and teach them how to live them correctly. At the end of the book there is a brief conclusion on each chapter with practical recommendations.

Why it is worth reading: you will understand why your usual actions do not find a response in the heart of the child. Five "languages of love" will help you find mutual understanding not only with children, but also with relatives, friends and colleagues.   

7. "The health of the child and the common sense of his relatives" Evgeny KomarovskyThe book, which is quite impressive in volume, easily and humorously describes complex things.

A well-known Ukrainian pediatrician consistently talks about everything that worries parents. The first part of the book describes in detail the period of pregnancy, childbirth and the first year of a child's life. In the second — everything about the lifestyle of a child after a year: diet, hardening, daily routine, adaptation to kindergarten and preventive vaccinations. The third part is entirely devoted to diseases: from the banal runny nose to polio. The book also contains a convenient index that allows you to easily find the information you need. Komarovsky gives clear and understandable recommendations and insists that the first place in the family should not be a child, but common sense.The main thing is a happy, full of strength mom, not boiled bathing water or sterilized toys.

Why it's worth reading: the book will help you find arguments in a dispute with obsessive relatives about how to raise your child.  

8. "The most important book for parents" by Julia GippenreiterThis collection includes three books by the professor at once: "To communicate with a child.

How?", "We continue to communicate with the child. Right?" and "Parents. How to be a child." Yulia Borisovna clearly talks about the inner world of the child, about the motives of his actions and how he sees his parents. The author rejects the old educational norms and suggests new effective solutions. It turns out that even with difficult teenagers, you can establish relationships if you learn to communicate in a different way. In the book, the author shares his experience of "re-education" of his grandson Fedor. You won't believe it, but psychologists also have problems with children!

Why it's worth reading: with the help of step-by-step instructions, you will understand how to properly educate children without suppressing their personality and individuality. 

9. "It's too late after three" by Masaru IbukaThe main idea of this book is that young children perceive the world through their parents and take from it exactly as much as the family gives.

Every child has a huge potential from birth. And the sooner you start developing it, the easier it will adapt and become an independent and self-sufficient person. Masaru Ibuka does not call for raising little geniuses, forcing children to attend several clubs or learn three foreign languages. The author does not aim to prepare the child for the school curriculum. But it reveals the secrets of how to turn learning into an exciting game.

Why it's worth reading: the book motivates young parents not to give up before difficulties and indicates the direction in which to move in order to grow a harmonious personality. 

10. "Mom is at zero. A guide to parental burnout" Anastasia Izyumskaya, Anna KuusmaaIs long-awaited parenthood not at all like vanilla photos from gloss?

Are others doing much better than you? Calm down, take a deep breath and immerse yourself in the real stories of moms from Anastasia and Anna's book. You will understand that burnout, aggression, depression and fatigue haunt many responsible and loving parents. In this book you will find tips that will help you overcome psychological barriers, self-doubt and destructive attitudes. With the help of psychological and meditative techniques, as well as self-help practices and answers to reflexive questions, you will finally understand yourself and get rid of the feeling of doom.

Why it's worth reading: the book will help you find peace of mind, get rid of guilt and enjoy a new role for yourself.

11. "Testing by a child. How not to let Happiness destroy Relationships" John Gottman, Julie Schwartz-GottmanThe main value of this book is that it tells not about the child, but about the relationship of parents after his birth.

Often, problems associated with the appearance of a new family member cause tension, quarrels and even divorces. The authors of the book are experts on family relations, spouses who became parents in adulthood. Using the example of their family and other real couples, they tell how to avoid typical mistakes, scandals and burnout and how to fill the house with an atmosphere of love for the harmonious development of the child. The book raises such important aspects of family life as emotions, feelings, sex. Much attention is paid to the causes and ways of overcoming conflicts. For the best effect, both spouses need to read the book at the same time.

Why it's worth reading: thanks to the tests at the end of each article, you will understand whether there are problems described in your family and, if necessary, you can solve them with the help of practical exercises. This book should stand next to parenting books for parents. 

12. "Brothers and sisters. How to help your children live together" by Adele Faber, Elaine MazlishThe authors of the book will tell you a secret that is unknown to most parents: brothers and sisters are not obliged to love each other by default.

More often, jealousy arises between them, quarrels and even fights break out. The task of parents is not to take the side of one of the children, not to act as an investigator and judge, not to compare children with each other, but to teach them to solve conflicts on their own. There are no abstract theories and long reflections in the book. But the difficult situations that parents face every day are described, and practical ways out of them are offered. At the end of each head of the family, who have tried these methods on themselves, share their experience.

Why it's worth reading: the book will help you look with different eyes at the relationship with your own brothers and sisters. Thanks to her, you will reconsider your usual parenting methods and avoid the mistakes of your parents. 

13. "A book for imperfect parents, or Life on a free topic" Irina MlodikA small volume and written without too much "water" book by Russian psychologist Irina Mlodik is for those who value their time.

The book contains a lot of real dialogues from the author's practice, in which mothers and children of different ages share their feelings and experiences. The author does not offer a ready-made methodology for raising children, but helps to look at the situation from the inside in order to understand the causes of conflicts. With the help of Irina's practical advice, you will learn to listen to the wishes of the child and recognize his right to make independent decisions. Don't strive to be perfect, just love your children.

Why it's worth reading: unlike the works of foreign authors, this book is adapted to our values, mentality and reality. It will be easier for you to understand the author and recognize yourself in the described situations and dialogues.  

14. "A deadly choice. Than the fight against vaccinations threatens us all" Paul OffitThis book is the result of a deep analytical work of an infectious diseases specialist and one of the developers of the rotavirus vaccine, Paul Offit.

The author fascinatingly tells where the anti-vaccination movement originates from and consistently refutes their arguments. The book truthfully shows the significant faces, victories and defeats of vaccination campaigns. Based on scientific facts and data from many years of research, the author proves that vaccination is the only sure way to keep epidemics under control. The author's goal is not to fight the enemy camp, but to open the eyes of thinking people.

Why it's worth reading: the book will help you get rid of doubts and make an informed decision that will preserve the health and life of the child.  

15. "Don't yell at the kids! How to resolve conflicts with children and make them listen to you" Daniele NovaraThe author teaches not to avoid conflicts, but to "live" correctly and extract the maximum possible benefit from them.

Daniele Novara's methodology is a cross between a rigid authoritarian parenting style and a style with "soft" boundaries based on attachment. The author tells how the psychology of a child from 2 to 16 years old changes and what causes conflicts in children of different ages. Shouting, threats and physical punishments do not help in education, but only cause retaliatory aggression and undermine the authority of parents. Do not shout if you want to maintain a trusting relationship with your child and raise a self-confident person.

Why it's worth reading: there are many flexible elements in Novara's modern approach that will help you find a non-standard way out of any critical situation related to upbringing. 

16. "Children from Heaven" Gray JohnPositive parenting is parenting without punishments and threats, based on understanding and mutual trust.

The author teaches parents to communicate with children from a position of cooperation. This approach, according to John, is inherent in children from birth. But thoughtless words, actions and even negative thoughts of parents interfere with building the right relationships in the family. The author examines situations that usually lead to conflicts with children, as well as intrapersonal conflicts. And the five principles of positive parenting will be a revelation for some parents.

Why it's worth reading: you will get acquainted with the modern approach to parenting, thanks to which they will feel confident in a changing world.

17. "The Stubborn child: How to set the boundaries of what is permissible" by Mackenzie Robert J. According to the author, stubbornness is not a bad character trait that needs to be fought, but simply a feature of temperament.

Stubborn children are like researchers. They constantly test the nerves of their parents for strength, trying to figure out: what will happen if I don't do it? Mackenzie offers his own method that will help break the circle of parental powerlessness. Just imagine: you no longer have to persuade, threaten, argue or give in. Illustrative examples and analysis of situations will allow you to change your behavior model forever.

Why it's worth reading: the book will give you the necessary "tools" with which you will learn how to build boundaries not only with children, but also with spouses, colleagues and friends. 

18. "French children don't spit food. Secrets of parenting from Paris" Pamela DruckermanPamela Druckerman is an American journalist who moved to France with her husband and three children.

She notices that little Frenchmen are not like American children. Pamela discovers the wonderful world of raising children in another country and humorously shares her observations with readers. The main conclusion that the author makes: in France, children do not become the center of the universe. The main thing in the family is a harmonious relationship between spouses. With the appearance of a baby, French mothers do not fall out of life. They remain well-groomed women, loving wives, in-demand employees and interesting people. Not all the ideas of the book need to be taken as a guide to action, but an alternative view of the author can be found.

Why it's worth reading: you will understand that motherhood is not a sentence. You can be a good mom without being around the clock with your child and not trying to anticipate his whims.

19. "How to raise a child happy. The principle of continuity" by Jean LedloffOne of the most controversial books for parents, the ideas of which are completely opposite to the previous one.

The author lived for two years among the Yequana people in South America and realized that adults and children in the tribe are happier and calmer than civilized Europeans. Ledloff observes and compares the methods of raising children in such different conditions and cultures. Mothers in the tribe raise their children the way their hearts and centuries-old traditions tell them to. They are alien to the stereotypes of society and are not interested in the hypotheses of pediatricians and psychologists. The basis of their upbringing is unconditional love for the child.

Why it's worth reading: the book teaches you to listen to your instincts and raise a child in harmony with nature and yourself.

*****

Each of these books is good in its own way. The authors offer different, sometimes contradictory methods of education. Read, draw conclusions, listen to advice, put it into practice. But remember: no one knows your child better than you. Treat it more like recommendations, not as an absolute truth. Create your own top books for parents.