Depression in children: what should parents do

Mental disorders affect not only adults, but also children. According to the National Institute of Mental Health (USA), 5% of adolescents aged 13 to 18 have been diagnosed with a severe form of depression. It is often associated with suicide attempts. Today suicide is the third most important cause of death of young people. 

The prevalence of childhood and adolescent depression is increasing every year. This is facilitated by a number of factors, which we will discuss below. Also in our article you will find information on how to recognize depression in a child and what to do. Causes of depression

"Why did this happen to my child?!" is the first question that anxious parents ask themselves. A psychotherapist can help them understand the causes of depression. The specialist will dive into the past and present, determine the current state of the child, help to understand what led to this.

The most common causes of childhood depression are:problems in the family (divorce, death of one of the parents, relocation and other significant events with a negative color);

• bullying, intimidation — online, at home, at school, with friends, etc.
• violence — physical, emotional, sexual;
• heredity — depression or other mental health problems in the next of kin.

It also happens that negative factors overlap one another. And if the child would have survived them individually, then together they create a concentrated influence on the psyche.

Depression in babies

Not only a teenager can get sick with depression, but also a much younger child. M. G. Kiseleva's scientific article "Depression in infants and young children" provides convincing evidence that this mental disorder can occur both in a one-year-old baby and in a preschooler. 

The article also describes a fact confirmed by research: a 1-5-year-old child is extremely dependent on the mental state of the mother. And this is what causes depression.

In 1990, an experiment was conducted: mothers were asked to keep a "stone face" (neutral facial expressions) while communicating with a child. Those children whose mothers experienced depression showed much less dissatisfaction with the "stone face" than children from the control group. This means that during the mother's depression, the child gets used to her low involvement, passivity. 

Not understanding what is happening, the child accurately reads the emotional state of the mother. And thus falls into the risk zone of developing depression already with him. 

Normal or depressive state

Your child may feel sad for a while, be depressed, cry. This is a natural and extremely necessary way for our psyche to give vent to emotions.

You should not immediately run to a psychoanalyst if the child has quarreled with friends or has been lying in bed all day. Watch!

You need to worry when the symptoms of depression are becoming more frequent. And the child is in a normal mood less and less often. The line between the norm and not the norm is very thin. 

Depressive Triad

In psychotherapy , there is a symptom complex called the depressive triad — the three main manifestations of depression:

1. Bad mood.
2. Deterioration of the quality and speed of thinking.
3. Lack of motor activity (lethargy, apathy).

These three symptoms are indicators of the child's condition. If you observe excesses in one or more of them, contact specialists.

Specific symptoms of depression in childrenSometimes depression is extremely difficult to recognize: it is well disguised as age-related behaviors.

Hormonal restructuring in adolescence can cause short temper, aggression, apathy. 

Therefore, it is worth paying attention not to one or two symptoms that appeared in the child during the transition period, but to trace the totality and depth of manifestations:Increased irritability.

2. Social isolation.
3. Painful perception of any changes.
4. Decrease or increase in appetite.
5. Insomnia or, conversely, a constant desire to sleep.
6. Outbursts of anger, emotionality.
7. Reduced concentration of attention.
8. Somatic manifestations: pain in the head, stomach.
9. Reduced performance.
10. Passivity, loss of interest in the usual activities.
11. A painful sense of guilt.
12. Deterioration of mental functions, poor study.
13. Obsessive thoughts about death, talk about suicide.

Depression may not manifest itself at all. The child behaves as usual, but then abruptly begins to use alcohol, drugs (as a rule, these are symptoms of depression in a teenager). Parents are looking for reasons, but often not there. Depression is one of the most common causes of bad habits. 

Mimicry of depression

In a state of depression, it is difficult for a child to learn, to do the usual things. He doesn't want to talk to his friends. Any action is performed with difficulty. However, the danger of such a condition is that it may not be depression at all, but anxiety or some other disorder, ADHD or other diseases. 

It is worth checking the body, because what looks like depression can be:impaired thyroid function;

• diabetes mellitus;
• epilepsy;
• chronic fatigue syndrome;
• vitamin deficiency;
• decrease in hemoglobin production;
• decreased immunity due to viral and bacterial infections.

Therefore, before making a diagnosis of depression, it is important to undergo a comprehensive diagnosis in order to exclude health problems. 

Depression and suicide

Depression in adolescents is a common phenomenon. 32% of teenage suicides occur against the background of depression. This disturbing fact should not frighten you, but make you pay more attention to what your child says and does. Pay attention to the signs of depression in a teenager, which indicate that he is thinking about suicide:

• talking or joking about death;
• the phrases "I don't want to live", "I don't see the meaning of life", "there is no way out".
• romanticizes death — reads or composes poems about death and suicide, writes stories, draws pictures;
• behaves recklessly — climbs on roofs, runs across the road in the wrong place, reckless in all available ways;
• throws away or gives his money and personal belongings to friends (preparing for suicide);
• googles suicide methods, searches the web for medications, weapons, etc.

If you notice something like this, do not hesitate. You can't do it on your own. Suicidal thoughts on the background of depression are a reason to immediately seek psychiatric help. 

What to do if a child has depression

It is possible to cope with childhood depression only if parents take the right and timely actions. 

If you suspect your child has depression, try to start:✓ talk to him.

It can be difficult: teenagers are reluctant to make contact with adults even in a normal state, and during depression, the unwillingness to share problems repeatedly worsens;

✓ Express your support. To say that you will do your best to deal with the problem. To assure you of your love and willingness to help. To be always there.

The following actions:

• undergo a comprehensive diagnosis of the body;
• make an appointment with a psychotherapist and follow his instructions;
• in addition to treatment with a psychotherapist, it is worth taking a course of work with a psychologist to identify the cause of depression and prevent its recurrence;
• visit a psychologist's consultation for parents to learn how to properly support and respond to the manifestations of depression in their child. 

What else can be doneParents always feel that they are not doing enough for their children.

Especially when it comes to the treatment of not the simplest mental disorder. Childhood depression — what else can you do for your child:

1. Organize your favorite activities.

During therapy, it is important to create the most comfortable home conditions for the child. Due to his difficult condition at the moment, it is worth giving up trips, noisy holidays, lifestyle changes. 

On the contrary, remember what brought joy to the child in the past. For example, singing karaoke, board games, cooking together, pet care. Go back to these classes. 

2. Create a trust space.

It is easier for children to make contact not during the so-called confidential conversation, but in the process of any joint activity. Do something with the child and talk unobtrusively. Do not ask with pressure, but just give an opportunity to express your emotions, plans, fears. Get into the habit of such communication during joint classes. 

3. Do not punish for revelations.

It's hard to hear the inconvenient truth. But if you have reached a certain level of frank communication, therapy brings results, and the child has decided to tell you about not the most pleasant moments from his life, do not betray his trust. Give up the urge to condemn, subtract, punish. With these actions, you will only close the small door of trust that has opened in front of you with a concrete wall. 

4. Gradually involve the child in social communication.If a noisy company does not yet cause him enthusiasm, start small.

Communication even with one friend will help to gradually return the child to full-fledged social interaction with others. 

5. Bring physical activity back into the child's life.

Hiking, bike rides, sports games, roller skates or skate — any physical activity is suitable. Physical activity will not only distract from sad thoughts, but also help to relieve muscle tension.

Also read: Why and how to teach children to work6. Control the fascination with gadgets.

Sticking in the phone itself has a negative effect on children, and during a period of depression can become a factor slowing recovery. It is better to leave online games and social networks for later - when the child feels better. 

7. Watch your nutrition.

It has been proven that the abundance of carbohydrate foods has a negative effect on mood. Feed your child's energy balance with healthy foods: healthy fats, high-quality proteins, fresh fruits and vegetables. Do not forget about healthy snacks. 

8. Give your child enough time to sleep.

If he's asleep, don't wake him up. If he can't sleep, turn on quiet music, give a glass of warm milk, sit next to him. Full sleep is the key to rapid recovery of both physical and mental strength of the child. If you have persistent insomnia, consult your doctor about taking mild sleeping pills.

9. Do good deeds.Nothing calms the inner pain like helping those who are much worse off.

Get involved in charity work, volunteering. Show your child an example of how people who are in difficult life circumstances are trying to get out. 

*****

Treatment of depression in a child is not only taking antidepressants, tranquilizers and neuroleptics. This is a huge complex work in a single bundle of psychotherapist + parents + child. Moreover, the work is long, requiring considerable time and effort. 

Seriously approach the solution of this problem and be patient. You will have to pay a lot of attention to the child, and perhaps change your approaches to education, improve the psychological atmosphere in the family. In general, there will be many tasks ahead, but you will definitely cope with them. Good luck!