Raising a child happy, healthy and successful is much easier now than 100 years ago. And all this is thanks to the achievements of scientists, teachers and psychologists.
In addition to the usual methods of "carrot and stick", persuasion, personal example and teaching situations, there are at least 20 full-fledged education systems, starting with the methods of Friedrich Froebel and Dr. Spock and ending with the musical method of the Zheleznovs. Some are already outdated, others pay attention to only one side of the child's development, others are too complicated for home use.
Therefore, we will consider only the 10 most effective methods of parenting and focus on the advantages and disadvantages to help you choose your option.
The Maria Montessori system is one of the most common methods of upbringing and teaching a child, created at the beginning of the twentieth century. Initially, the system was developed for children with developmental delay, and then it was adapted for everyone else.
At the center of the methodology is a child who is free to do whatever he wants. Then comes the learning environment, represented by different zones for reading, writing, mathematics, creativity, etc. And only then an adult comes on stage, whose role is to offer the child options and "help him do everything himself" (the motto of the methodology). The main emphasis in this case is on teaching writing, since the author of the system believed that this skill is more important than the rest.
Freedom of choice and individual approach give excellent results. The child grows independent, disciplined and empathic.
At the same time, he is not evaluated and is not left for the second year — everyone develops at their own pace.
There were some disadvantages. Firstly, it will not be cheap to create a learning space divided into special zones. Secondly, as disadvantages of the system, experts note the denial of the active role of the teacher, underestimation of the importance of role-playing games and insufficient attention to the aesthetic education of children.
Read also: Naughty child: psychologist's advice on how to cope with the "little monster"
Like the previous version, the system was created in the early twentieth century. Rudolf Steiner, the creator of anthroposophy, opened a school for the children of employees at the tobacco factory in Waldorf in order to bring his achievements to life. Over time, his ideas gained popularity all over the world.
The Waldorf method is based on creativity and culture. Children sing, participate in theatrical performances, do painting, eurythmic dancing and making crafts from natural materials. Eurythmy is a unique idea of a technique by which children actively move, clap, dance, sing and read poetry several times a day.
The two main principles on which the school stands are the so—called "non-anticipatory" upbringing and imitation of adults through plot-role-playing games.
Steiner believed that childhood should not be taken away from a child, so intellectual learning does not begin until the age of 7.
The system has a special attitude to technology. The use of TV, computer and gadgets is limited as much as possible, since it is believed that they adversely affect the development of the child.
The Waldorf method is criticized for starting to teach children too late, missing precious time when they can learn everything faster and easier. In the negative, she is also put the creation of greenhouse conditions that complicate the socialization of the child and the transition to a regular school. But the examples of Jennifer Aniston, Sandra Bullock and Ferdinand Alexander Porsche prove not only the viability of the school, but also its effectiveness.
Watch the video - Dmitry Karpachev tells how to learn to understand a child correctly in order to choose a suitable parenting method:3. Glenn Doman Cards
American neurophysiologist Glenn Doman has developed a recovery technique for children with nervous system damage, which helped not only cure them, but also allowed them to tighten their intellectual development. Then he adapted the system for healthy children.
The main idea of the technique is early physical and mental development in close relationship.
In no case should the child be swaddled and restricted in his movements — let him learn to crawl as early as possible. And from the age of 6 months, it's time to start his training with the help of special cards.
What are these cards? These are large white cards with red dots for learning to count and words for learning to read. The collection also includes pictures with images of plants, animals and other objects. Russian scientist Andrey Manichenko adapted the cards to the peculiarities of Russian grammar. You can buy them or make them yourself.
The task of parents is to show the child these cards several dozen times a day. The systematic use of flashcards ensures the early development of speech, writing and later speed reading, a large vocabulary and curiosity.
The disadvantage of the system is the passivity of children in the perception of information — they only receive data, but do nothing with them. Plus, this method is not suitable for children with advanced kinesthetics — instead of studying, they will want to touch and taste the cards.
Cecile Lupan is a person who perfected Glenn Doman's methodology using exclusively her own experience as a mother of two daughters.
Cecile emphasized an individual approach to the child, so she expanded the version of Doman's cards by adding auditory and tactile elements. The child wants not only to look, but also to touch — provide him with the necessary samples. I like to make sounds from objects — let him knock on everything he can reach.
Cecile also added exercises from all fields of knowledge: geography, history, music, drawing, paying special attention to swimming. Moreover, she insisted that it is necessary to deal with the child from birth.
In addition to the obvious advantages of the comprehensive development of the child, there is one disadvantage of this technique — the baby's mother will need almost all of her time for classes and exercises with the child. It will be difficult to cope without a reliable assistant.
Having once gone to Venezuela in search of diamonds, the American writer Jean Ledloff soon forgot about jewelry and focused on observing the Indians of the Yequana tribe. Subsequently, she returned to them 4 more times to study in detail the methods of raising children.
As a result of Jean Ledloff's research, an ambiguous book "How to raise a child happy" was born.
It is ambiguous in that it almost completely rejects Western parenting traditions and offers a so-called natural approach to the child:
the "manual period" lasts as long as the child wants;
the child participates in all the mother's affairs — this accelerates the process of his socialization;
it is necessary to feed the baby not according to the schedule, but on demand;
mom does not take care of the child, but gives him the freedom to get any experience;
it is allowed to evaluate only the actions of the child, but not himself.
Such a variant of natural education among the Yequana Indians led to the fact that the children practically did not cry, grew up happy and sincere.
Some elements are not applicable in modern conditions (after all, we are not Indians living in the wild), but in general the technique is quite effective.
"It's Too Late after Three" is the sensational and only book by the co—founder of Sony Corporation, who had to dig deep into parenting methods due to his son's illness.
The main message of the book is that the child's brain is formed in the first three years of life, and we must try to invest in it during this period the maximum knowledge and skills. Preference is given to teaching foreign languages and music at the academic level.
Masaru Ibuki argues that there are no concepts of easy and difficult for children, so they perceive both toys and samples of world cultural heritage equally, which means that the latter should be given more time. Toys in general should be few — they limit the imagination of the child and dissipate attention.
Physical development is also not in the last place, and in a variety of forms — from jumping rope to skating. It's great if physical exercises are performed according to a schedule.
The Ibuki system is not fully confirmed by scientific facts, but it immediately became widespread in Japan and abroad. The only element for which Masaru Ibuki's method is criticized is the permission to use corporal punishment for up to 2 years.
Boris and Elena Nikitin are another parents who have developed a method of education based on personal experience. They began to create their own system with the birth of the first child and improved with each subsequent one (there are 7 children in the family).
The mission of Nikitina's parents was to learn to listen to the signals of the child, to give him complete freedom in choosing activities and interests and to educate an independent integral personality.
Therefore, a lot of attention in the methodology is paid to creating a special environment for learning (tables, diagrams, maps on the walls), training (simulators, special exercises) and educational aids for children aged 1.5 to 5 years (cubes, pyramids, puzzles, tasks). These devices help the child to find a variety of solutions to a particular problem and reveal his abilities and inclinations at an early age.
The Nikitins' methodology still remains relevant today, although it was developed in Soviet realities. You should be careful only with one of the central elements of the technique — hardening. Before turning a child into a "walrus", it is worth consulting with a pediatrician.
How to teach a child to read at 4 years old? Using the innovative method of warehouse reading by Nikolai Zaitsev.
He developed a complex based on cubes with painted warehouses. Not letters, not sounds, not syllables, but warehouses — pairs of vowel and consonant letters or consonants with a soft/hard sign. Cubes of different sizes, colors, weight and sound, depending on the filler.
Playing with such cubes, having fun and putting them into turrets and locomotives, after a few sessions the child reads whole sentences without any problems. He gets an initial idea of the Russian language at such an early age, which gives him a head start in development compared to his peers.
And that's not all. The famous teacher has developed similar complexes for teaching mathematics and English.
Nikolay Zaitsev insists that classes should be conducted from the age of 2. Critics say that early reading will lead to mistakes in writing, as well as difficulties in re-learning letters and reading syllables in elementary school.
Professor Amonashvili's humane pedagogy is not even a method of education and training, but rather a philosophy that at one time revolutionized the relationship between adults and children.
To love and respect all children, whatever they may be, is the central idea of the whole system. The author believes that there are no bad children, there are parents and teachers who do not understand them. Therefore, he suggests development through cooperation — adults do not control, do not force the child and do not evaluate him, but treat him as an equal and act together.
As a result, the child grows up independent and comprehensively developed, and a strong bond of trust and respect is established between parents and children.
This approach has no disadvantages, so the ideas of Shalva Amonashvili continue to gain popularity around the world.
Scientists have been talking about the influence of music on the development of a child for a long time, so new methods of education based on music education are constantly being developed. Proven options are the Zheleznovs' "music with mom" and the method of Dr. Shinichi Suzuki.
"Music with mom" is a set of exercises (games, finger exercises, exercises, massage) for the development of motor skills and speech, necessarily accompanied by music. The advantage of the method is that it does not require additional education and serious equipment, because you can turn on music for kids from the first weeks of life.
Dr. Suzuki's technique is different in that it is not limited to the inclusion of music. Shinichi Suzuki believes that all children are naturally talented and can be taught to play any instrument. If a child's early childhood is accompanied by classical music, he grows up softer, able to subtly feel the mood and condition of other people, loving and understanding art.
Be that as it may, the goal of any musical method of education is not to grow a virtuoso, but to create a comprehensively developed personality, an intelligent and noble person.
Most methods of raising a child concentrate on some one factor of upbringing: early reading, priority of writing, musical education.
But they are all united by two important principles: the rejection of evaluation and the thesis of early development (except for the Waldorf school), which makes them so effective.
However, the choice is always up to the parents.
Each child is a unique personality, developing at his own pace and having his own interests and preferences. In order to unlock the potential, identify talents in time and raise an independent child, we recommend that you study all the techniques, choose the elements that are suitable for your baby and combine them.
The main thing is that both the child and you should be interesting and fun, because in addition to brilliant indicators in learning, it is important that the child grows up healthy and happy.
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